Beelzebub's Tales to His Grandson

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Toosidji

 

28 The Chief Culprit in the Destruction of All the Very Saintly Labors of Ashiata Shiemash

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“It was then that I learned that this Lentrohamsanin arose, or, as it is said there, ‘was born,’ on the continent Asia, in the capital of Nievia, the town Kronbookhon.

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“The conception of his arising resulted from the blending of two heterogeneous ExioĆ«haries formed in two already elderly three-brained Keschapmartnian beings there.

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“His ‘producers’ or, as it is said there, his ‘parents,’ having chosen as the place for their permanent existence the capital of Nievia, moved there three terrestrial years before the arising of that later Universal Hasnamuss.

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“For his elderly and very rich parents he was what is called a ‘first-born,’ for although the blending of their ExioĆ«haries had been many times actualized between them before him, yet, as I found out, they, being deeply engaged in the business of acquiring riches and not wishing to have any hindrance for this, had recourse at each actualizing of this sacred blending to what is called ‘Toosy,’ or, as your contemporary favorites express themselves, ‘abortion.’

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“Towards the end of his activities in acquiring riches, ‘the-source-of-the-active-principle-of-his-origin,’ or, as it is said there, his father, had several of his own what are called ‘caravans’ and he also owned special ‘caravansaries’ for the exchange of goods in various cities of this same Nievia.

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“And ‘the-source-of-the-passive-principle-of-his-origin,’ that is, his mother, was at first of the profession of what is called ‘Toosidji,’ but later, on a small mountain, she organized what is called a ‘Holy-place’ and published broadcast among other beings information concerning its supposed special significance, namely, that beings of the female sex, without children would, on visiting this place, acquire the possibility of having them.