Beelzebub's Tales to His Grandson

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Chirman

 

43 Beelzebub’s Survey of the Process of the Periodic Reciprocal Destruction of Men, or Beelzebub’s Opinion of War

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“This philosopher Atarnakh was born in that same city Mosulopolis in a family of those who are called ‘Kurds.’

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“He, on attaining responsible age, became for the planet Earth a very great learned being.

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“In the very beginning, this same Kurd, Atarnakh, perseveringly studied during many Earth-years every possible question which it seemed to him might give him an answer to the question, ‘what in general is the sense of man’s existence,’ and during his study of these questions it seems that by some means there fell into his hands a very ancient but well-preserved what is called ‘Sumerian manuscript.’

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“This manuscript was well preserved because it had been inscribed on the skins of being-snakes called ‘Kalianjesh’ with the blood of the being ‘Chirman.’

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“As my investigation made clear to me, the contents of this manuscript, inscribed by some ancient being, extremely interested the philosopher Atarnakh who was particularly struck by that place of the manuscript where, as presupposed by this ancient learned being, it was said:

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“‘In all probability there exists in the World some law of the reciprocal maintenance of everything existing.

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“‘Obviously our lives serve also for maintaining something great or small in the World.’

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“This idea expressed in the ancient manuscript so captivated the philosopher Atarnakh that thereafter he devoted himself wholeheartedly to the study of only this aspect of the question which had interested him.

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“This idea served as the basis for his whole further plausible theory, which, after minute researches during several years and elaborate experimental verifications of his own conclusions, he expounded in his chief work under the name ‘Why Do Wars Occur on the Earth?’